Richard Burns 1971 - 2005

Today marks the memorial service for rally driver Richard Burns who died from a brain tumour on November 25, aged only 34. He is (so far) the only Englishman to win the World Rally Championship and was one of the best drivers to ever have come out of the UK. As well as being a talented driver he was a true gentleman and brought a lot of dignity to his sport.

After collapsing while on the way to a rally he was diagnosed with a brain tumour. He has spent the last two years fighting this terrible illness and the early signs were that he was winning the fight. Unfortunately things took a turn for the worse recently, unbeknownst to most people inside and outside the sport. And then he tragically died on November 25 this year, four years to the day from when he won the World Championship.

Richard Burns, gone but never forgotten....

Happy Christmas everybody

I may not be in a position to post until after Christmas now so I would like to take the opportunity to wish you all a very Merry Christmas. I hope it is relaxing, peaceful and full of cheer.

Visit to Paris

Theresa and I were in Paris last week-end on a quick sighseeing and shopping trip before Christmas. It was her first visit and my first since 1986! And I don't remember too much of that trip so it was quite enlightening this time round. And what a beautiful city! The buildings are so old and yet in such wonderful condition. and the city was a lot more chilled than I'd have thought. There was also a very nice artistic vibe about the place.

We certainly didn't see everything, or even try to, but we've both got the taste to go back I think. The weather was OK, the food and drink were superb (real Petit Pain au Chocolat in the morning - yum!) and the city was small enough to feel cosy.

Here are some pics for those who haven't been....



A view of the Eiffel Tower from the Champ de Mars



Theresa under the arches of the Eiffel Tower. Because it's Christmas they've put lights all over the spans. These lights flash on the hour, every hour. You can see the lights going on this photo



Theresa at the top of the Eiffel Tower. Despite being 1000ft up it's not as scary as you'd think.



One of the other famous landmarks - the Arc de Triomphe



The happy couple in front of the Arc de Triomphe



The Place de la Concorde, at the other end of the Champs Elysee, with an Egyptian obelisk 'acquired' by France a century ago



In front of the Notre Dame cathedral



One of the stained glass windows in the Notre Dame



The best Christmas tree in Paris, in front of the Notre Dame. Huge balls ...



The biggest painting I've ever seen!! Theresa is in front to give an idea of scale. it is of paris at the turn of the century and is in the Musee d'Orsay



Me in front of a Monet, the first I've been up close to in real life

A chilli situation

I was sent this. don't know if it's true, but made me cry in sympathy. I'm not the best with hot food so can totally empathise with judge number 3.


The notes are from an inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting from Canada.
Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chilli cook-off.The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in.
I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chilli wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted".

Here are the scorecards from the advent: (Frank is Judge #3)
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Chili # 1 Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili
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Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Holy **** , what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 2 Arthur's Afterburner Chili
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Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what
I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 3 Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili
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Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.
Judge # 2 -- A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill.
My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano.
Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest.
I'm getting s**t- faced from all of the beer.
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Chili # 4 Bubba's Black Magic
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Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice.Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili..
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue,but was unable to taste it.
Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-lb bit*h is starting to look HOT...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?
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Chili # 5 Linda's Legal Lip Remover
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Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground,adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili
had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off.
It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Scr*w those rednecks.
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Chili # 6 Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety
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Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic.Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulphuric flames.
I sh*t myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair.
No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my a**hole with a snow cone.
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Chili # 7 Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili
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Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chilli peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am worried about Judge # 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava like sh*t to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Scr*w it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
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Chili # 8 Tommy's Toe-Nail Curling Chili
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Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balance chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself.
Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor fella, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili!!!

A proper post to follow soon.

When cars mate ...

When a Ford Escort took a shine to Lolita and tried to mate....

Thanks Steve! Lol

Munich Christmas Market

Once again it is nearly Christmas. The days get darker, the nights get colder and McDonalds starts playing shite Christmas pop songs. Unlike previous years I am going to have a Chritsmas tree and maybe even a glass of mulled wine nearer the day. Not being alone in the house makes me feel more snuggly and much more up for Christmas.

I was out in Munich this week for probably the final time of 2005 (smiling) so took the opportunity to go to the annual Christmas market. One thing I will give Bavaria is that they do Christmas very well. It helps that there's often snow about, but you do feel very in the spirit of the moment. The markets are all nice and not tacky like we have in london. The lights are tasteful, the decorations sober(-ish) and the main tree in the square is HUGE!!

I have some news.....

I've been itching to make this announcement for a while now, but had to hold off for reasons which will become apparent. I know I've been a bit distant in the last few weeks, but this might also go some way to explain it.

Oh, hell, can't hold back anymore......

I'M GOING TO BE A FATHER!!!!!

Theresa and I found out a little while ago that she is pregnant and we went and had the scan at the end of last week. It is always a worry until the first scan but, thankfully, all is well and the doctor said the baby is really healthy and very active. And there is only one child. Which is good. Lol! Baby is due on June 8 2006 (at the moment). Mummy is doing very well, although a little more tired than before, and so far has not suffered much sickness or problems. We are both really, really chuffed and have found the whole experience so far quite overwhelming, and in a really good way. Our families are also over the moon about it, and it is really bringing both our families together in an amazing way.



I have to say that an event like this completely changes your perspective on things. It was a bit of a surprise for both of us, but a really good one as well. Now thoughts are turning to things such as 'I need to get a bigger car', 'the spare room will need to be decorated - pink or blue?', 'where the hell is all the baby stuff going to be stored', and so on. All fun though.

More news as it happens, but I just wanted to post something about this.

PS: I apologise in advance if I fall into the trap of going on and on about baby stuff, but what the hell. And if anyone out there has any advice I would welcome it.