Changes to blog - good, but bad!

I've had the bright idea of updating my blog and changing a few colours and such like. Mainly motiovated by the new Blogger which allows you to do that. Unfortunately the mind is more capable than the ability and I think I've buggered it all up. Please bear with me while I fix it over the next few days.

Eleses - thank you very much for the post and I'm glad you're still around. I will link you back on the blog when I've figured out how to fix everything.

The November update

It's been more than 2 months since I last did a post to the blog and I'm feeling massively guilty about it. I told myself at the start of the year that I should make regular posts, and that kind of didn't happen. Then when Meg was born I thought it might be good to put updates on how I am, how she is and how my general thoughts are. And once again this hasn't really happened either! There's no point crying over spilt milk or even saying I'll be doing this more regularly, but at least I can keep the blog alive.

It's been a full-on few weeks. I've had to focus on two things, probably to the detriment of other matters, just to keep my sanity. While this has not been great for friends, blogs and general hobbies, I think I have come through a manic few weeks with my sanity as intact as it ever was.

The first priority has been my young family. Theresa and I I are doing very well, and still very much in love. We spend as much time together as possible and I just find being with her incredibly relaxing. We have our moments like any couple do, but I feel that we're getting through them quicker and the pain lasts for less time afterwards. Each time we do have a disagreement it does hurt as well, and I find myself very upset afterwards. I just need to get better at spotting an argument developing and heading it off before it manifests itself. I think it's partly a pride thing with me and not being one to back down from a fight. Also I've never really been hugely bothered about having a disagreement with a partner before figuring I could live without the relationship if it really got bad. I guess it was partly not being bothered enough about working for the relationship. It's different this time round though, and has been different since day one. And I can't imagine life without my wife in it.

Megan is also doing great. She's over 5 months old now and growing fast. I really miss her during the day and treasure the moments I get with her before I go to work in the morning and before she goes to bed in the evening. She's such a happy child and seems to deal with any eventuality with stoicism and a smile on her face. We've taken her to many different places already, including overseas, left her with various friends and family and she's going to a wide range of classes with Theresa. And every time she looks around with her big blue eyes and smiles away. She now weighs over 13lbs (double her birth weight), wriggles like a trooper and has been trying to talk since about 3 months. She lies there gurgling, dribbling and making a whole range of noises for ages. We have a routine of sorts going as well, where she feeds about five times per day and then I put her to bed at around 7pm. She tends to be getting tired at that time so it fits, and it also means that theresa and I get some sort of normal evening for each other as well. We get to have a nice meal together over a game of Chess or Monopoly, or in front of current favourite Scrubs. As Meg is now getting older we are also trying to get out a bit more. She's sleeping well and rarely has issues, so we're more comfortable leaving her with babysitters. We've taken up Badminton at the local sports club, despite not really knowing the rules. I'm thinking it will appear on Eurosport soon and I can brush up on the rules then! Badminton gets us both running around and is quite a laugh, and gets us out of the house one evening a week too!

The other priority has been work. My department is now complete and the team all know what they're doing. Each of them is working semi-independently and managing various accounts well. The proof is in the reduction in number of problems we're having, and the strength of the relationships we have internally and externally. The Summer was pretty tough for me and I have to confess I wasn't enjoying it particularly. I could see that there would be an end to the madness and that kept me going, but it did make for long and tiring days. Thankfully things are working pretty well now, and long may that continue!

Blog is 2!!!

It was 24 months ago that I was sitting in an office very similar to this one, looking out on a beautiful day and thinking of home. It’s been a mixed couple of years with lots of changes in my life, and varying regularity in posting. But it’s been wonderful meeting people online and I look forward to that continuing. Happy birthday to my blog…..

Nearly blog birthday

My blog will be two years old this month, I can't quite believe it!! It
started off one slightly bored day while sitting in Germany, having just
bought a digital camera and while looking for some way to store my digital
photos online somewhere. I was looking purely for a storage site, but was
determined not to pay fees to store the pictures. And I cam across Blogger
and it all started from there. It became a place where I interacted with
people all over the world and proved fascinating to look into other peoples
lives. It became a place where I shared many thoughts and ideas, and at
times put more stuff online than I was probably telling friends. And it has
seen probably some of the biggest changes and happiest moments of my life.
Since I started my blog I have bought a house, met and married my wife and
had a child!! Among many other adventures.
When I started the blog I wrote the following down:
"I am a 31 year old who is in the process of trying to make sense of what I
am and what I'm here for. I kind of worked it out 10 years ago, but got a
bit lost since. So I thought if I started writing stuff down it might bring
some order to my otherwise disparate life. I love what I do, where I am and
who I'm with, but there's something else I'm looking for. I can smell it, I
can taste it and I can almost feel it. But I now need to know what 'it' is.
So here is my unplanned journey of discovery through life.... "
And I'm thinking how true and relevant it still is. Having had a baby I
think I've had a taste of what we're here for. Without demeaning the whole
event it is why we're here and having a child makes you realise that. This
is different to what I realised a few years before while travelling the
world, but I think more significant in some ways. I believe I will still
keep pursuing the meaning of life and keep viewing the world from a
travellers perspective. And I think that's a good thing. When I wrote the
text I left probably the biggest question until last. I'm looking for
something, but not sure what. Well, in the last 18 months I have found love
and true contentment. Sounds a bit sickly maybe, but it brings a lot of
stability to life. I find myself enjoying long slow walks and gardening,
long suppers and curling up in front of a good film. Even lying in bed and
having a coffee at the week-end.
I don't think I am at the end of my journey and I would hope that I don't
reach the end until the end of my life. But I am discovering more pieces of
the puzzle and that is incredibly gratifying.
Thank you everyone who has contributed to this blog and I hope you and I
will still be here in a years time having had a great 12 months.

Day 50

I can't believe it has been a month since my last posting. I keep mentally
thinking about posting, but never seem to find the time to sit down for a
couple of hours and get some pictures and text online. I would also like to
have a scout around and see what everyone has been up to. I've always felt
it's about making the time to do it, rather than lacking the physical time.
However maybe that doesn't factor in the arrival of a new person in Casa de
Stancombe, and all of the excitement and time that takes up.

On that front things are going really well. Megan is growing by the day and
is still such a placid child. She sleeps a pretty good amount of time still,
and is now starting to interact more when she is awake. She is smiling and
making gurgling noises, and seems to be focussing on objects further and
further away. She has gone out into the big wide world a bit now as well,
and seems to have enjoyed it every time. She is even coping with the furnace
like temperatures we are having in London. Unlike her parents who have had
enough of it now!!! She is still breastfeeding really well and seems to
really take everything in her stride. It's going to be interesting to see
whether she will stay like this, or this is the calm before the storm. I
rather think she is a tough and yet inquisitive character, but I guess time
will tell. She has already grown out of some clothes, and is getting
heavier. At last count she was 9lb 2 oz which is right on track. Overall she
is doing really well and it is proving to be a wonderful experience having a
child. There are the inevitable moments when you wish she'd settle so you
can finish your dinner before it goes cold, but otherwise she's great.



Outside of baby world things are also going pretty well. Work is flat out as
normal, and I've been recruiting a new team recently. There are lots of
changes within the company, so it is quote an exciting time as well. Despite
leaving my last job because of too much travelling I still find myself going
to various airports regularly and ended up in Scotland last week on business
too!! It is a lot more fun though and I enjoy being in the office and doing
this job. (Don't get me wrong I also very much enjoy being at home, but I
have no problem with going to work.) It's nice to be in a company where you
feel appreciated as well. Makes such a difference....

Guess that's probably it for the moment. Can't believe that it's hotter than
the sun outside at the moment. I know I'll be moaning about getting rained
on and being cold through the winter, but right now 37 Celsius in the centre
of the city of London is not funny. Especially having to get a load of
motorbike gear on and right through it. But anyway....

Junior is growing fast

I can't believe it's been nearly two weeks since my daughter arrived. Time is flying and she is changing everyday. We were warned that the first few days are a nightmare and we would get no sleep at all and stuff. But so far Megan has been great. She is feeding regularly, sleeping for up to five hours at a stretch (during the night) and not crying unless something is really wrong. Basically she is an angel through and through.

It's hard to work out what her character is, but she seems to be a tough cookie and is quite happy being picked up and taken outside. She has a fascinating range of expressions when she sleeps, including this impish smile pictured below. She's getting stronger by the minute and has already kicked me in the teeth a couple of times during some fraught nappy changes.



I've been trying to work out how I'm feeling about being a dad now. It's a life-changing event and one that I would recommend to anyone. I wasn't that up for having kids until a year or so ago, but now I can't imagine my life without Megan in it. I sit there with her in my arms and can't stop just looking at her with a big smile on my face. I feel she is already interacting a bit with me and we have this great little pulling game going on. I also sit there an wonder what she must be thinking. I know she can't see very well yet, but what must she think some of the blurred images she gets are? As adults we have all of these ideas ingrained as to what is good/bad, big/small, pretty/ugly. But as a child you won't have any of that (or would you?). It'd be fascinating being inside her head for a while. I think that fresh outlook and innocence would be so rejuvinating. and I'm looking forward to being around that innocence as she grows up in the coming days, months and years.

The new Stancombe

On Saturday June 3 at 19.18 Megan Grace Stancombe arrived in this world. She weighed 6lb 15oz/3.156kg and was born naturally. The labour lasted about 16 hours, but mum has said it wasn't as bad as she was expecting. Mum and baby are both doing really well. They both came home after 48 hours in hospital (for checks - normal) and our new lives have started. She is proving to be an absolute angel and very placid. She feeds for England and does spectacular poos, but sleeps for decent periods of time. Mummy and daddy are settling into some kind of routine and we are really enjoying parenthood.
It feels kind of strange having her in our hands now. It's been a long build up to her arrival and I am really really happy to have her now. Being a dad is brilliant and I am really looking forward to seeing her develop. I'm under no illusion that things will be tough at times, but she is already showing signs of being a tough and strong little monster. And she appears to be adapting well to everything that is thrown at her.

Forgive me for being a bit absent recently, but I hope you can understand. Thank you everyone who has sent goodwill messages. They are so appreciated and have really lifted us during those sleepness moments. I'm on paternity leave at present so will hopefully have time to go and say hi to everyone online. But please bare with me!

Update for May

What a month it’s been? I can’t believe it’s been a month actually, time seems to be flying past so fast. So what’s been happening? Spring arrived and then left again and I think we’re now in Autumn in London! We’ve got a hosepipe ban where I live and yet lots of roads and tunnels are being closed because of flooding. I’ve been caught out in it riding my bike on a couple occasions and the rain has been bouncing off the road level with my waist!!! It’s doing wonders for the garden, and I have elephant grass outside now. It’s been so wet I just can’t get out there to mow the lawn.

Went to Palma in Mallorca for a work conference and had a great time. It did involve work (and my first presentation in about 4 years – went surprisingly well), but also a lot of time to team build. I think it’s easy to look at these type of events cynically and call them jollies, but we have had a lot of new people starting recently, including me. It was a great chance for everybody to relax and get to know each other better. Since returning from the trip everyone is pulling together much more, and I can honestly say that everyone did and does get on. There were a lot of highlights, but a group (what’s the technical term?) of Dolphins swimming next to the boat we were on was amazing. Dolphins are even better in the flesh than I imagined. It was incredibly tempting to jump in the sea with them, but not sure how that would have gone down. One day I would love to swim with Dolphins.



Outside of the conference work is going pretty well. It’s been three months since I started and I think things are changing for the better. I’m not here to change the world, but hopefully my team are getting more motivated and we’re getting more organised. It will take a bit of time to get to where I think we should be, but we’re making progress. The first big job will be done soon and that will hopefully open the door to other projects getting rolling. And I’ve recruited a new member of staff as well! Nothing like trying to do everything at the same time.

Most importantly Megan is nearly with us. Theresa is REALLY big now and her tummy has massively grown in the last couple of weeks. The baby has turned and engaged (normal and good), and we’re all ready to rock and roll. The nursery was completed last week-end amid much swearing and destruction. Have managed to cover all of the holes and scratches with shelving and furniture so on the face of it, everything looks spotless. And I don’t imagine that Megan will care much for a while anyway. As long as there are flashing things that make noise everywhere she’ll be happy.



I am going through all sorts of emotions at the moment about the impending arrival. I am really excited about the new addition to Casa de Stancombe and I think we’re going to be such a great little team together. I’m not naïve enough to think that it’s going to be plain sailing, but I think we’ll do right by Megan. I think that Theresa and I have talked plenty about our approach to bringing her up and I think that is pretty much sorted as well. We’re going to try and introduce some kind of structure to mealtimes, bedtime and so on. I only write this now so that I can refer to it in a few months time and see how we got on!!



As well as being really excited about Megan coming I also have moments of huge fear about what will happen. My greatest fear being that something will happen to Theresa (and Megan) during the birth and that I might lose one or both of them. And I don’t know what I would do if that happened. I tell myself that it’s stupid and irrational, and I’ve not had thoughts like this before. But it keeps coming back to haunt me. I don’t know if it is because I care more about my family or what it is really.

Spring is coming

Spring is such a wonderful time of year I find. I haven't totally decided if it is my favourite time of the year or not, but I think it is right up there. I've started noticing a lot more colours and life around me this year than ever before. It might be because I'm taking mych more of an interest in the garden and that is translating to the rest of the world as well, I'm not sure. I would like to think that it is because nature is more beautiful in 2006 than ever before.

The UK is not renowned for it's good weather (although I sometimes feel that we are renowed for talking about the weather!!!), but when the sun comes out it does feel great to be alive. Those crisp spring mornings with a bit of dew in the year. And then the cloudless skies which turn into a lazy warm evening. There is an American Indian expression - Hokahay - which translated means 'It's a beautiful day to die'. What it means is that if I died today then I would leave on a most stunningly beautiful day. Which kind of sums up Spring to me.

More wedding ...

Us with our mums


Us with friends


Us with family


Us with our dads


All of the men looking smart

Has it really been 10 days since I got married? Time really flies when
you're busy. Theresa and I are still really happy and still reliving our
wedding day regularly. We're collating the photos at the moment and here are
a couple more for those who are interested.

The wedding

Well, I'm now married. Last Friday was one of the most magical days of my life. Theresa and I had planned the day quite carefully, and it went even better then either of us could have hoped I think. Looking back on it there's nothing that I wish we'd done, nothing that I wish we hadn't. Our guests were great, the venue was perfect and it all ended before people got too tired. While this may sounds crass, it was the happiest day of my life and I would like everyone to know it!! And looking into the eyes of my (now) wife and telling her I will love her, hold her and keep her for the rest of my life was one of the most powerful moments ever for me.

There were 33 of us at the wedding, a mixture of friends and family on both sides. We go married in Galstonbury Town Hall, in the South-West of England, and then moved to a restaurant in the countryside that Theresa and I both love very much. We stayed in the restaurant all afternoon and had the place pretty much to ourselves. The afternoon was spent eating and drinking, and chilling quite a bit too. Which is how Theresa and I wanted the day and how we pretty much are as well.



As if it was planned the sun broke through the clouds just as we finished the ceremony. And then came out once again when we took a break from the lunch in the afternoon.

I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone who came, and I'm sorry that we couldn't have all of our friends with us on the day. Everyone who was there and everyone who was thinking of us made it so special.

A few points about the day:

- Theresa looked gorgeous in her dress, and pulled off being 7 months pregnant as well!
- We did individual menu on each place with each persons name on it. It really helped the restaurant and the guests who didn't know each other.
- We mixed all of the guests up so they weren't sitting in couples. Many new friends were made and we noticed people come out of their shells as a result.
- No single cake, but individual cup cakes with each guests initials on them. We then went round at the end of the afternoon giving each person their cake in a samll box. It gave us a chance to formally say 'bye'.
- Proper restaurant rather than brought in catering. So much better quality and quantity!

Thank you again to everyone. Now just got to get used to wearing a ring on my finger!!

Long overdue appearance...

First of all HUGE apologies for my really long absence. I hope you are all very well. I am working through your blogs to see what you’ve all been up to. Rest assured that you have been in my thoughts, despite my absence.

So what’s new? The last few weeks have been among the busiest I can remember. Almost everything that can be changed has been changed since late January!! So where to start?



Theresa is doing very well. She is now getting bigger by the day, but everything is still going well. She’s had a couple of minor illnesses, but for the most part is living a reasonably normal life. She is more tired and is more out of breath (normal by all accounts), but is still only eating for one and not two. I am making up the deficit I reckon!! All of the midwife checks have gone well, and everything seems very well with Megan. She is proving to be a very active child and seems to be continually kicking and moving around. Not sure what this will mean for when she’s born, but we’ll see. It’s quite reassuring to feel her moving around though, especially during the times when Theresa has been unwell.

Next up is that I’ve left Publishing and moved to an advertising company. I don’t want to say much about the leaving period except that it proved very tiring and got quite messy towards the end. Which was a great shame because most of my memories from there are good. But now I’m into the next phase of my career and everything seems to be going really well. There is a lot to do, but it’s proving to be an interesting challenge so far. The people are cool, the company seems spot on and watch this space. I was talking to my colleagues today about blogging and threatened to put some of them online….... but maybe I'll save that for a special post.

The wedding plans are about to come to fruition. IT’S THIS FRIDAY!!!!! Everything has been sorted and it’s just a case of turning up really now. I’m really excited about it and I think it’s going to rank as one of the best days of my life. It will be quite a small family and very close friends affair, but I prefer that. With Theresa being 7 months pregnant now we probably can’t do too long a day anyway. I’ll put a post on after our honeymoon next week. We’re off to West Wales to a secluded caban (spelt that way) near a remote bay. Hopefully we’ll get to see Whales and Dolphins, and will be able to just chill. It’s only for four days, but will be such a great tonic.

The house and garden are coming along well. All of the preparations for Megan are pretty much done and we’ve been concentrating on the garden. At the moments we’re very much in the planting phase, but even I can start to see how different and colourful it will be. With Spring hopefully just around the corner I really can’t wait. The decking is already proving it’s worth and we’ve enjoyed a couple of breakfasts on it already. We’ve got the furniture, heater, etc.. and a BBQ arrived the other day (thanks Alf and Marny) which just needs assembling and then we’re go!! I’m already dreaming of the lazy Summer evenings spent chilling on the decking while watching the sun go down. With the sweet smell of flowers and shrubs wafting up from the garden, and mingling with home grown vegetables and cooking on our BBQ. The plan is for the decking to become our dining room for 6 months of the year. I just need the air temperature to rise above 2 Celcius now!!!



It was a sad day last week when I sold Lolita the Smart car. I sold her on Ebay in one day (!) to a guy in Malta. He is exporting her as we speak and I’m sure she will have a great life out there in the sun. I was quite sad saying goodbye because she has lived many many adventures with me. And she will always have a special place in my heart. But things have to move on and we’ve bought a Skoda estate to allow for Megan and her stuff. And so far the new Stancombe family vehicle has proven a delight. Very comfortable, sporty and remarkably economical as well.

Again I’m sorry for the absence and I will try harder. Think of us on Friday (24/03) at 11.30 GMT as Theresa and I get married. And I’ll try and put more updates on very soon.

The year so far

Hope everyone is well. My apologies for the long period of inactivity, but 2006 has been mental so far!! I knew this year was going to be full-on, but I had no idea everything planned (and more!) would happen in the first month.

So here goes ...


The big news is that I have found out I am having a daughter in June. The scan picture above was taken in mid-January. And we have decided to call her Megan. Mother and daughter are doing well and the scan showed baby to be healthy, very active and have long legs. And I'm really excited about having a little girl. I gather they are angels for the first 10 years and then the problems start (boyfriends primarily!!), but I can live with that. The main thing is that she appears to be healthy and growing alarmingly fast! I am still completely overwhelmed to be having a child, and in a really really good way. I am enjoying life with just Theresa and I, but I have no fears for when Megan arrives. In the sense that baby will disrupt things or change the adults' relationship in any bad way. I think we will get another travelling companion and a friend.


The redevelopment of Casa de Stancombe continues apace with some awesome decking having been built out the back of the house. Although it's a bit chilly to be out there at the moment I am really happy with the work. It's pretty huge, but should provide an adequate playpen for Stancombe junior when she arrives. And I can smell the BBQ's already!! Cocktails at mine once the temperature rises, everyone?

Next up is just the garden to finish ...

In other news I have decided to move jobs. I haven't been too happy in my current company for a while now and an opportunity has presented itself in a related (although not publishing) industry. After several interviews they decided to offer me the job at the start of this week. I'm really pleased because it is a bigger company and will provide a lot more stability in my and my family's life.

Finally Theresa and my wedding has been arranged for the end of March this year. We're going to get married in a town called Glastonbury in Somerset, which is close to where I come from. It's quite a mystical place and has huge amounts of history. Our wedding will be conventional, but it's wonderful to be allowed to get married somewhere with an inspiring aura to it and a lengthy history.

... and deep breath out.......

Happy New Year

I would like to wish everyone a very happy new year and all the best for 2006. I hope you all have a fantastic year with many high moments and many great adventures. I'm looking forward to seeing what you all get up to in the coming months.



These pictures are of the fireworks display that we had in London last night.

Richard Burns 1971 - 2005

Today marks the memorial service for rally driver Richard Burns who died from a brain tumour on November 25, aged only 34. He is (so far) the only Englishman to win the World Rally Championship and was one of the best drivers to ever have come out of the UK. As well as being a talented driver he was a true gentleman and brought a lot of dignity to his sport.

After collapsing while on the way to a rally he was diagnosed with a brain tumour. He has spent the last two years fighting this terrible illness and the early signs were that he was winning the fight. Unfortunately things took a turn for the worse recently, unbeknownst to most people inside and outside the sport. And then he tragically died on November 25 this year, four years to the day from when he won the World Championship.

Richard Burns, gone but never forgotten....

Happy Christmas everybody

I may not be in a position to post until after Christmas now so I would like to take the opportunity to wish you all a very Merry Christmas. I hope it is relaxing, peaceful and full of cheer.

Visit to Paris

Theresa and I were in Paris last week-end on a quick sighseeing and shopping trip before Christmas. It was her first visit and my first since 1986! And I don't remember too much of that trip so it was quite enlightening this time round. And what a beautiful city! The buildings are so old and yet in such wonderful condition. and the city was a lot more chilled than I'd have thought. There was also a very nice artistic vibe about the place.

We certainly didn't see everything, or even try to, but we've both got the taste to go back I think. The weather was OK, the food and drink were superb (real Petit Pain au Chocolat in the morning - yum!) and the city was small enough to feel cosy.

Here are some pics for those who haven't been....



A view of the Eiffel Tower from the Champ de Mars



Theresa under the arches of the Eiffel Tower. Because it's Christmas they've put lights all over the spans. These lights flash on the hour, every hour. You can see the lights going on this photo



Theresa at the top of the Eiffel Tower. Despite being 1000ft up it's not as scary as you'd think.



One of the other famous landmarks - the Arc de Triomphe



The happy couple in front of the Arc de Triomphe



The Place de la Concorde, at the other end of the Champs Elysee, with an Egyptian obelisk 'acquired' by France a century ago



In front of the Notre Dame cathedral



One of the stained glass windows in the Notre Dame



The best Christmas tree in Paris, in front of the Notre Dame. Huge balls ...



The biggest painting I've ever seen!! Theresa is in front to give an idea of scale. it is of paris at the turn of the century and is in the Musee d'Orsay



Me in front of a Monet, the first I've been up close to in real life

A chilli situation

I was sent this. don't know if it's true, but made me cry in sympathy. I'm not the best with hot food so can totally empathise with judge number 3.


The notes are from an inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting from Canada.
Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chilli cook-off.The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in.
I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chilli wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted".

Here are the scorecards from the advent: (Frank is Judge #3)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 1 Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Holy **** , what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 2 Arthur's Afterburner Chili
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what
I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 3 Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.
Judge # 2 -- A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill.
My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano.
Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest.
I'm getting s**t- faced from all of the beer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 4 Bubba's Black Magic
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice.Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili..
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue,but was unable to taste it.
Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-lb bit*h is starting to look HOT...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 5 Linda's Legal Lip Remover
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground,adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili
had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off.
It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Scr*w those rednecks.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 6 Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic.Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulphuric flames.
I sh*t myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair.
No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my a**hole with a snow cone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 7 Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chilli peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am worried about Judge # 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava like sh*t to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Scr*w it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chili # 8 Tommy's Toe-Nail Curling Chili
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balance chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself.
Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor fella, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili!!!

A proper post to follow soon.

When cars mate ...

When a Ford Escort took a shine to Lolita and tried to mate....

Thanks Steve! Lol

Munich Christmas Market

Once again it is nearly Christmas. The days get darker, the nights get colder and McDonalds starts playing shite Christmas pop songs. Unlike previous years I am going to have a Chritsmas tree and maybe even a glass of mulled wine nearer the day. Not being alone in the house makes me feel more snuggly and much more up for Christmas.

I was out in Munich this week for probably the final time of 2005 (smiling) so took the opportunity to go to the annual Christmas market. One thing I will give Bavaria is that they do Christmas very well. It helps that there's often snow about, but you do feel very in the spirit of the moment. The markets are all nice and not tacky like we have in london. The lights are tasteful, the decorations sober(-ish) and the main tree in the square is HUGE!!