Redundancy

I was told on Friday that I might be made redundant soon. It came as quite a shock as the company seemed to be riding out current economic problems quite well. And I am having a good year budget wise due to some negotiating and smarter thinking on the print buying I do. So I really thought that if any redundancies would happen I would not be top of the list. But apparently I was wrong. The MD summoned me into her office and just told me I was going to be made redundant. At 4.30 on a Friday afternoon before the Bank holiday! No emotion. No 'I'm afraid to say..'. Just 'you're going'. Amusingly she then asked me if I had any questions, and then said that she couldn’t answer me to every one that I asked! (Which kind of begs the question – why ask me if I have any questions if you’re going to refuse to answer them?)

Due to the number of people being put forward (is that the right phrase?) there has to be a consultancy period where we apparently get an opportunity to put forward a case for us not being made redundant. I’ve been looking at all of the information online about this and the company has to justify us being got rid of, and has to make every effort to keep us on. I have read up on what is supposed to happen, but it need to be initiated by the company. So far we have just been told that we have to elect a representative for the 9 of us in my division and then the process will start. We then have a minimum of 30 days consultation before the decision will be made if we are to be laid off or kept on.

My family and I have gone through a whole range of emotions over the past few days, but I think it’s mainly been confusion and anger. The stupid part of all this is that I want to work, I enjoy my job and I think I am actually doing a good job as well. I’m finding I have two heads on with this situation as well. My 5am head where I worry about how we will cope and what will happen – how will I keep a roof over our heads and food on our plates. Then I suppress those thoughts with my logical head where I tell myself that we are not extravagant so our lifestyle won’t have to change dramatically. There are systems in place for redundancy, especially in the current climate and we will get help with the mortgage and money from the government – hey, I’ve been paying my taxes for 10 years so I have no guilt about claiming jobseekers allowance money for a short time if that’s what it comes to.

What is proving the hardest to deal with is the not knowing. Nothing is going to start for nearly a week as it is. For example we were out for a walk yesterday and we thought it’d be nice to stop for a coffee. But then we thought no as that is being extravagant and we must tighten our belts. I think if they’d just turned round and said ‘go’ then we’d move on and get on with our lives. I think I’d still be angry, but not so unsettled.

There are lots of questions flying around my head, but one of the big ones is what do I do job wise? The ideal for me is that I stay where I am, even though my personal relationship with the company will be damaged, probably beyond repair – but if I am going to leave I would rather it was on my own terms. Or do I wait until this process is well under way and try and gauge if I will be staying or going before I start trying to sort myself out. Or do I start looking around for a new job now as there are still jobs out there if you’re prepared to look. The latter is emotionally preferable as I will feel like I am doing something and have more control over the situation. But any new job will probably not be doing what I currently am so there is a certain fear of the unknown. And the money may (probably) will not be as good. And if I find a new role do I go for it and hand in my notice to my current company. I do want to get as much money from my current company as I can so that I can feel some personal satisfaction.

Coming into the office this morning there was a strange atmosphere as everyone was still reeling from the announcement last week. Everyone seemed shocked and quite depressed as I think many realised they could be next. It took a bit of time, but various conversations started springing up and certainly the ‘shop floor’ staff seem more resolute now that first thing. There is still an air of mistrust of the company which I think may take time to heal, if it ever does. I’m finding that people are slightly nervous around the 9 of us as no-one seems to know what is going on or what is going to happen, or even what to say. It’s not great and I sort of feel like no one is going to come out of this a winner.

I’m sure there will be many more humorous/crap things that will happen in the next few weeks, but today’s incident is: The 9 of us are based in different offices so we thought we would meet up before the Thursday afternoon deadline to have a chat and decide among ourselves who our representative would be. We decided to go to the other office to meet up as it seemed easiest. We decided to meet up on the suggestion of one of the Directors of my division. We weren’t trying to hide anything, but HR called me (not sure why me as I wasn’t instigating this – good omen/bad omen?) and told me it would be inadvisable for the 5 of us in our office to leave during office hours as we would not be able to justify the time travelling to and from the meeting, and we should do a conference call instead. When I asked how they had found out about the meeting (not that I was bothered about them knowing until they called me) they wouldn’t say. And when I asked what would happen if we went ahead anyway they just said that is would not prejudice our case. But you know when someone says something like that in a particular tone of voice you get the feeling that they’re lying? So I don’t know if they’re trying play with our heads a bit, divide us up or what they’re up to. But I just feel like I’m getting kicked from all sides at the moment.